Friday, November 30, 2007

Not for long.

Maybe the old saying absence makes the heart grow fonder only works if the guy you are dating doesn't have a girlfriend. I have to admit in the past week, I have definitely missed CK. I have missed the time we spend together, talking with him, and really being around him. However, I have not missed the constant worrying about the BFPE, nor wondering if he's talking to her, planning time to be with her, blah blah blah.

I think this past week has given me some good perspective on what I want. I am not going to write off the relationship with CK just yet, however I think my intentions and where I see this going has changed. I am definitely ready to date someone who only wants to date me. I am pretty much done with any of the drama that comes with being the "other woman," regardless of how far away she is and how little of a chance they have of actually being in the same place for an extended period of time again.

I am super stressed out this week with the end of grad school. In 3 short weeks, I will be done all of my classes and I'll officially be a librarian. The onset of extreme stress has led to more thinking about things in my life that I'd rather leave off my mind when there's little I can do about it. There is something about being 27, finished school, with a clear direction in my life and waiting around for some guy to realize that he needs to break up with his girlfriend that lives in another country. Hmm. Yeah... one of those things doesn't mesh with my "life plan." Not that I have a solid one of those, but solid enough that I know that I don't need to encourage things that don't belong. So for now, I'll enjoy the pleasantries that CK brings into my life. But unless things change dramatically, he's not going to be around for long.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good for you!

Anonymous said...

Too often we all settle for far less than we deserve. I know I have countless times. Congrats on not doing that! Why should he have his cake and eat it too?And why shouldn;t you have a fabulous man who is devoted only to you?

Debbie said...

I agree with your decision. I feel the same way right now. I've pretty much got my shit together, I'm 27, and I'm ready for something real...I'm done with games and all the BS men seem to enjoy.