Last night was Google's birthday. It was a celebratory event as it was also his downstairs neighbor's birthday as well, so his whole house was going out to celebrate both birthdays. I was planning on sending him chocolates to his office on Thursday, but he decided to work from home instead, so I had to send him the chocolates on Wednesday instead. I was very nervous about them getting there and to him, because I'd imagine that the Google offices are huge. But, despite all the odds against me that day (there is another person who works there with the same name, who normally works in the CA office, but apparently was working in NYC this week... and got the chocolates originally!) he did get the chocolates that day (thanks, Rachel!) I did spend a good part of the day worried/stressing over whether or not he got them, since I didn't end up hearing from him until he was on his way from work. But I did hear from him, so I'm not going to stress it.
Last night, I got him a few presents that reminded me of him/our time together, and I think he was pretty appreciative of them. We hung out for a bit then headed over to Chifa for dinner with the neighbor whose birthday it also was. I had been very concerned before the date about payment, because I had no idea how his neighbors handle all this with it being 2 birthdays. Not that I minded paying for his other neighbor, but I didn't know what to expect. So I made sure I had enough cash on me, which I never do, an extra ATM stop on my way was necessary.
Google found out earlier this week that he's going to be an uncle, which is great news. Apparently all but one of his neighbors knew this news, so he decided to tell her at dinner. Instead of saying, "I'm going to be an uncle," as he told me, he says, "My mom is going to be a grandmother." Now, I had heard this news earlier, so I was paying attention, but I wasn't REALLY paying attention. I was just sitting there, sipping my sangria, gauging the reaction of his neighbor to this news. So at first I was confused as to why she wasn't immediately congratulatory, until I realized that she thought that he meant that I was pregnant. I nearly spit out my drink as soon as I realized that was what she thought as she stammered through some strange congratulatory remarks. Which were more like, "Um, wow. That's really great news..." I turned about 10 shades of red, and clarified that I most certainly was NOT pregnant. I was mortified. I mean obviously it wasn't my mistake, but if after 6 weeks of dating, they would assume that I even COULD be pregnant, well, that doesn't really speak well for me in their eyes. Right? The rest of dinner was great. We did end up splitting the dinner 3 ways (covering both Google's and his other neighbor's birthday), so it's a good thing I made the ATM stop on my way! Google, of course, did not want me paying for him. So he kept trying to give me money, which eventually I took some of it, put the rest in his pocket, which he used to pay for the cab ride home. I used what he gave me to pay for lunch today. The rest I will use to buy him some wine for his apartment. I think it's sweet that he didn't want me paying for him, but he could have let me, and I would have been fine with that. Like I've said before, he treats me very well, it's hard to get used to!
I am struggling a bit with how I think Google's neighbors think about me. Ultimately, it doesn't matter to me what they think of me. I want them to like me, but if they don't, oh well. They're just his neighbors... and probably his closest friends that live in Philly. He considers them his extended family, and yes, it does matter if they like me. I wish it didn't. But this is new territory for me, because really I've never dated a guy who has ANY friends. I'm glad that he wants to involve me in his life and introduce me to all his friends (tomorrow I get to meet his friend from college and his wife who are visiting from California). He hasn't met any of my friends yet. The annual camping trip is coming up, last year Mr. Perfect came with me to that. That is the first time I EVER brought anyone to the camping trip. It did not go well. Mr. P was anti-social, and very awkward the entire time, even stormed out one time when he was angry with me/a situation and basically made a lot of that weekend very uncomfortable for me. My friend keeps asking if I want to bring Google, and I'm sure he'd fit in much better, but I'm a little gun-shy to bring anyone this soon. If we were going to the Poconos like we usually do, I'd ask him to come up just for a night, like Sat-Sun. But we're going to a different house, and it's like 5 hours away, which is a lot just for a weekend, too much just for a night. I'm going to see how this weekend pans out, and maybe I'll ask him to come.
We spend a lot of time together, and every time (with the exception of the Monday I overstayed my welcome) has been a fantastic time. I have my reservations, as I think is normal in any relationship, but so far so good. I'm definitely thinking long-term with Google, but I don't know if that's how he's thinking yet.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
In Between Time.
Right now, I'm in between time with Google. We just spent a really nice afternoon together. We went to brunch and to the movies. We didn't have plans to hang out today, but yesterday morning when I was leaving I accidentally left my camera there and I need it for school tomorrow, so he said he'd drop it off. I suggested having brunch and going to see a movie since he was already coming out here. During the movie, I was back and forth in my own head about where is this going. I'm trying to not be in my head so much, to not think about the future and just live in the moment and enjoy it... but sometimes in the moment, I ask myself, is this something I want for a long time?
I've mentioned before that Google is not affectionate, publicly. And sometimes even when it's just us, I feel like it's work for him to do things that come naturally to me. Like a hug or holding hands or anything like that, I don't think he thinks to do that instinctively. I think this is something that can be learned.
We went to see Avatar today, which was supposed to be the movie we saw on our second date, but we ended up seeing Up in the Air instead.. which is shorter, and wasn't sold out everywhere at the time. It was a better choice for a second date. A month later, Avatar is still sold out on the weekends, at least in IMAX. I told him I would go over early and pick up the tickets because he was afraid it would be sold out, and I got there 2 and a half hours early, but it was still sold out. So we saw it in 3D instead, which was fine. During the course of this really long movie, we didn't have a whole lot of contact. I would occasionally have my hand on his arm or something, but we weren't cuddling like I'm used to at the movies. This bothers me, but I'm not going to let it stop me from showing affection. However at one point during there was an especially upsetting scene to me, and I normally would have gone to hold the person I'm with's hand at that point, but I didn't want to have to think about my actions on top of my emotions at that point. So since we're not doing the whole hand holding thing... I pulled away, not a whole lot. But I guess it was noticeable. He reached over and held my hand, which may not seem like a huge deal to anyone else, but to me, it was completely reassuring. To me, it shows that he cares about how I feel, and while affection might not be the most natural thing for him to show, he's willing to try.
After the movie, I was a little disappointed because this week is busy and his birthday is on Thursday, so I probably won't see him before then. And we spent a good amount of time together, but it's definitely less than I'm used to (especially after last weekend!). But I didn't want to push it, after the conversation we had last week, I want to give him as much space as he needs, whenever he needs it. I wasn't even supposed to see him today, so I was feeling good that we did spend already 6 hours together. We were leaving the theater and he asked me what my plans were for the rest of the day. I was confused because it was almost 6:30, so the day is pretty much over. I told him I didn't have any plans, and asked what he was doing. He told me that he was going to make dinner for himself and his neighbors, and I was welcome to come over if I wanted. Of course I want to. I know I'm supposed to make him miss me, and not see him every time he wants to see me. But these games are things I'm not good at. So I'm on my way over there in about 10 minutes, for dinner and dessert (L&S, that's for you!), and I'll be coming back home tonight.
My reservations are still there, but I'm feeling the old excitement coming back too. I'm not worrying about how long this is going to last, or where this might end up, at least I'm going to try. I can't change what I went through with Mr. Perfect, but I will use every bit of what I learned to make whatever this is work with Google.
I've mentioned before that Google is not affectionate, publicly. And sometimes even when it's just us, I feel like it's work for him to do things that come naturally to me. Like a hug or holding hands or anything like that, I don't think he thinks to do that instinctively. I think this is something that can be learned.
We went to see Avatar today, which was supposed to be the movie we saw on our second date, but we ended up seeing Up in the Air instead.. which is shorter, and wasn't sold out everywhere at the time. It was a better choice for a second date. A month later, Avatar is still sold out on the weekends, at least in IMAX. I told him I would go over early and pick up the tickets because he was afraid it would be sold out, and I got there 2 and a half hours early, but it was still sold out. So we saw it in 3D instead, which was fine. During the course of this really long movie, we didn't have a whole lot of contact. I would occasionally have my hand on his arm or something, but we weren't cuddling like I'm used to at the movies. This bothers me, but I'm not going to let it stop me from showing affection. However at one point during there was an especially upsetting scene to me, and I normally would have gone to hold the person I'm with's hand at that point, but I didn't want to have to think about my actions on top of my emotions at that point. So since we're not doing the whole hand holding thing... I pulled away, not a whole lot. But I guess it was noticeable. He reached over and held my hand, which may not seem like a huge deal to anyone else, but to me, it was completely reassuring. To me, it shows that he cares about how I feel, and while affection might not be the most natural thing for him to show, he's willing to try.
After the movie, I was a little disappointed because this week is busy and his birthday is on Thursday, so I probably won't see him before then. And we spent a good amount of time together, but it's definitely less than I'm used to (especially after last weekend!). But I didn't want to push it, after the conversation we had last week, I want to give him as much space as he needs, whenever he needs it. I wasn't even supposed to see him today, so I was feeling good that we did spend already 6 hours together. We were leaving the theater and he asked me what my plans were for the rest of the day. I was confused because it was almost 6:30, so the day is pretty much over. I told him I didn't have any plans, and asked what he was doing. He told me that he was going to make dinner for himself and his neighbors, and I was welcome to come over if I wanted. Of course I want to. I know I'm supposed to make him miss me, and not see him every time he wants to see me. But these games are things I'm not good at. So I'm on my way over there in about 10 minutes, for dinner and dessert (L&S, that's for you!), and I'll be coming back home tonight.
My reservations are still there, but I'm feeling the old excitement coming back too. I'm not worrying about how long this is going to last, or where this might end up, at least I'm going to try. I can't change what I went through with Mr. Perfect, but I will use every bit of what I learned to make whatever this is work with Google.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Intuition.
So I was not completely wrong when I felt that something was off between me and Google this past weekend. I don't think it was so much my intuition as it was something that was glaringly obvious. We spent too much time together and he was just desperately itching for some space. That's fine, I just had different expectations. The weird thing is that when we were out tonight for dinner, and HE brought it up (I was not going to say anything!), he mimicked my words from the blog almost verbatim. He said that he could tell I was disappointed and he thought I had different expectations for the day. Um. Yup. Exactly what I wrote. I don't think he's found the blog or anything, but it does concern me that he used the exact same words I did to describe exactly how I was feeling. Clearly I wasn't hiding my feelings very well.
All of this does not come without a whole new set of reservations. Google opened up a bit to me tonight after dinner, which was really nice. I don't feel like we've had many talks that have been about ourselves. I try sometimes, but usually it's unsuccessful. So when he brought it up tonight, I was very pleased with that. I have concerns that it's very similar to the issues I dealt with Mr. Perfect and ultimately what caused us to break up. I feel like I might bring Mr. P's baggage into this tied up with my own some how. I'm really glad he told me, but it definitely threw me for a loop. It was NOT the conversation I was expecting to have tonight. I had planned out the conversation that I thought was the worst possible scenario and this was no where near as bad, but surprising. Now that I know, I can see similarities in behavior between Google and Mr. P. I'm not going to allow this to interfere with something that could be really great, but it's in my mind now, and it's something that will be there until I feel confident that it won't end the same way that things with Mr. Perfect did.
I don't ever want to be in a place where I was a year ago again. I don't make mistakes so I can repeat them, if I learned anything from my situation with Mr. Perfect is that I can't fix someone else's problems. I'm pretty sure despite their similarities with these issues, Google has a few years of experience on Mr. Perfect, and here's to hoping that his coping mechanisms are better in tact.
Tonight ended up being a very good night to get to know Google a little better. I was very nervous/anxious about the outcome of tonight's date. All in all, I'm glad my gut still in this game, and I can trust my instincts. I'm also going to learn from experience and tread carefully for however long it takes. There's no need to rush into this, so maybe a few steps back wouldn't hurt anyone.
All of this does not come without a whole new set of reservations. Google opened up a bit to me tonight after dinner, which was really nice. I don't feel like we've had many talks that have been about ourselves. I try sometimes, but usually it's unsuccessful. So when he brought it up tonight, I was very pleased with that. I have concerns that it's very similar to the issues I dealt with Mr. Perfect and ultimately what caused us to break up. I feel like I might bring Mr. P's baggage into this tied up with my own some how. I'm really glad he told me, but it definitely threw me for a loop. It was NOT the conversation I was expecting to have tonight. I had planned out the conversation that I thought was the worst possible scenario and this was no where near as bad, but surprising. Now that I know, I can see similarities in behavior between Google and Mr. P. I'm not going to allow this to interfere with something that could be really great, but it's in my mind now, and it's something that will be there until I feel confident that it won't end the same way that things with Mr. Perfect did.
I don't ever want to be in a place where I was a year ago again. I don't make mistakes so I can repeat them, if I learned anything from my situation with Mr. Perfect is that I can't fix someone else's problems. I'm pretty sure despite their similarities with these issues, Google has a few years of experience on Mr. Perfect, and here's to hoping that his coping mechanisms are better in tact.
Tonight ended up being a very good night to get to know Google a little better. I was very nervous/anxious about the outcome of tonight's date. All in all, I'm glad my gut still in this game, and I can trust my instincts. I'm also going to learn from experience and tread carefully for however long it takes. There's no need to rush into this, so maybe a few steps back wouldn't hurt anyone.
Monday, January 18, 2010
Expectations
In school we set expectations for a lesson before we teach it, it helps guide us to where we want our students to go, and we can assess if they actually learned what we wanted them to learn. In real life, expectations are nothing but trouble. I have the habit of keeping my expectations very low, for about a week, and then once things start to progress in a direction I think is favorable, they sky rocket. Which of course only leads me to be bitterly disappointed when things don't work out the way that I want/think they should.
Things with Google have been progressing well... maybe too well? We've been going out, seeing each other multiple nights during the week/weekend, went on a double date with one of his friends last week, he took me to a concert this past weekend. I've been pretty good at keeping my hopes high but expectations low with him. I guess I flipped the switch this weekend, and the expectations shot up a bit beyond my control.
We saw each other Thursday night for the double date. We went to the Franklin Institute for the night sky event they do once a month. It was a great time, very interesting. It was cool to hang out with another couple, I had met them at new year's but I got to talk to them more on Thursday obviously. We went back to his place, I stayed over and left very early in the morning for school. I had to work Friday night, and we had talked about hanging out one or both nights this weekend, since we were both off on Monday. I had to work at the library all weekend, so Monday was truly my only day off. Days off for me are like gold. I don't just spend them with anyone because a full day off is hard to come by with my schedule. When he originally asked me if I was off on Monday, and I told him I was, he responded with an excited "yes!" which I took as a good sign. We didn't actually make plans for Monday, but after that response, I figured we'd be doing something together.
Saturday night we went out in West Chester. A band he really likes was playing, and he was excited to go back there since he hadn't been there in a few years, and he wanted to show me around where he used to live, etc. Seriously, it was like being with someone who was going back to his hometown for the first time in years. He pointed out all the places he used to hang out, his favorite park, the hill he went sledding on when it snowed... All of this from when he lived there when he was 28. But it was the first place he lived in on the east coast, and I'm sure it holds a lot of memories for him. I get that way about Brooklyn sometimes. We went to dinner at a very good sushi restaurant and the band was very good. (I have to say, of all the guys I've dated, we have a very compatible palate - food wise and musically - more so than anyone else so far.) The one area we seem to be incompatible is affection. I'm not an overly affectionate person in public. I like the usual, hand holding, an arm around the other person, a hand on the knee or back. I'm not overly PDAish, but compared to how completely unaffectionate Google is, I might as well be the most overtly affectionate person you've ever met. When we're out in public I get NADA from him. He did kiss me on the street between dinner and the concert, and that was SHOCKING to me. He also put his hand on my knee on the drive home that night, which was also surprising. And that is it in terms of affection that I got from Google that night. When we got back to his place, it's a whole different story, naturally. Night and Day.
All in all, Saturday night was the best night of the weekend. We had a great time, I was exhausted though, but when all was said and done, I thought it was the most he had opened up to me, sharing with me his life in West Chester, and taking me to see the concert. Sunday morning he drove me back to my house because I had to work. He mentioned that he didn't want to ask me to do anything with him on Monday because it was my day off, and I should be able to do anything I want on that day. I assured him that I wanted to spend my day off with him, again, no set plans were made... so maybe I was wrong to assume.
Sunday night after the library and my youth group meeting, I went over to Wegmans, picked up some food for dinner, and went over to Google's. I made a fairly awesome comfort food dinner of grilled cheese (Gruyere) on ciabatta bread with sliced avocado and bacon, paired with a side of tomato bisque soup and sweet potato fries. It was delicious. We watched tv, finished the rest of UP from last weekend, and then started to watch the pilot of this show he's very much into. I fell asleep about 20 minutes in, so I can't tell you much what it's about. We were both fairly tired, so we went to bed, and really just slept.
Yesterday was one month since our first date (I did not mention that to him - it didn't really seem relevant), and to be at the point where we spent an entire night/morning together that may have been passed by a G rated movie slightly unnerves me. Not that I need to be completely physical, all the time, but that's the only time I feel like I receive affection from him. If you take that out of the equation - it's no different than hanging out with a buddy. So, Sunday night and Monday morning lacked affection.
This morning we got up, and needed to get some coffee. He had mentioned making breakfast the night before, so when we were at the coffee shop, I was surprised when he got a cinnamon roll too. He asked me if I wanted anything, but I didn't get anything because I still for some reason thought he was going to make breakfast when we got back. He didn't. We watched Star Wars (because on Thursday night when we were out with his friends - it came up in conversation - he asked me a direct question about it - I had to admit that I have never in my life been able to stay awake long enough to watch the entire movie - I can no longer say that.) and around 1pm, he mentioned that he wanted to go for a bike ride. This wasn't a "let's go on a bike ride together" kind of comment. It was a "I'm going on a bike ride, you need to go" kind of comment. I was very confused because I had thought we were going to spend the day together. It was a beautiful day out. And I can understand him wanting to spend the day outdoors, I did too. We could have definitely done something outside, together. But he made it clear that he wanted to ride his bike, so I left. I hadn't eaten anything all day, I was frustrated that I had planned my day/evening to be in the city (I was going out for restaurant week with friends - so I planned on staying in the city all day and just meeting up with them after... not driving out and back to the city, yet again.) I was very let down, expectations wise. From where we started on Saturday to where we ended up today, I was just disappointed. Even the conversation we had briefly tonight left me feeling like maybe things have shifted a bit, things aren't looking as rosy as they once were, and I'm definitely not all smiles all the time. Oh real life, welcome back.
Things with Google have been progressing well... maybe too well? We've been going out, seeing each other multiple nights during the week/weekend, went on a double date with one of his friends last week, he took me to a concert this past weekend. I've been pretty good at keeping my hopes high but expectations low with him. I guess I flipped the switch this weekend, and the expectations shot up a bit beyond my control.
We saw each other Thursday night for the double date. We went to the Franklin Institute for the night sky event they do once a month. It was a great time, very interesting. It was cool to hang out with another couple, I had met them at new year's but I got to talk to them more on Thursday obviously. We went back to his place, I stayed over and left very early in the morning for school. I had to work Friday night, and we had talked about hanging out one or both nights this weekend, since we were both off on Monday. I had to work at the library all weekend, so Monday was truly my only day off. Days off for me are like gold. I don't just spend them with anyone because a full day off is hard to come by with my schedule. When he originally asked me if I was off on Monday, and I told him I was, he responded with an excited "yes!" which I took as a good sign. We didn't actually make plans for Monday, but after that response, I figured we'd be doing something together.
Saturday night we went out in West Chester. A band he really likes was playing, and he was excited to go back there since he hadn't been there in a few years, and he wanted to show me around where he used to live, etc. Seriously, it was like being with someone who was going back to his hometown for the first time in years. He pointed out all the places he used to hang out, his favorite park, the hill he went sledding on when it snowed... All of this from when he lived there when he was 28. But it was the first place he lived in on the east coast, and I'm sure it holds a lot of memories for him. I get that way about Brooklyn sometimes. We went to dinner at a very good sushi restaurant and the band was very good. (I have to say, of all the guys I've dated, we have a very compatible palate - food wise and musically - more so than anyone else so far.) The one area we seem to be incompatible is affection. I'm not an overly affectionate person in public. I like the usual, hand holding, an arm around the other person, a hand on the knee or back. I'm not overly PDAish, but compared to how completely unaffectionate Google is, I might as well be the most overtly affectionate person you've ever met. When we're out in public I get NADA from him. He did kiss me on the street between dinner and the concert, and that was SHOCKING to me. He also put his hand on my knee on the drive home that night, which was also surprising. And that is it in terms of affection that I got from Google that night. When we got back to his place, it's a whole different story, naturally. Night and Day.
All in all, Saturday night was the best night of the weekend. We had a great time, I was exhausted though, but when all was said and done, I thought it was the most he had opened up to me, sharing with me his life in West Chester, and taking me to see the concert. Sunday morning he drove me back to my house because I had to work. He mentioned that he didn't want to ask me to do anything with him on Monday because it was my day off, and I should be able to do anything I want on that day. I assured him that I wanted to spend my day off with him, again, no set plans were made... so maybe I was wrong to assume.
Sunday night after the library and my youth group meeting, I went over to Wegmans, picked up some food for dinner, and went over to Google's. I made a fairly awesome comfort food dinner of grilled cheese (Gruyere) on ciabatta bread with sliced avocado and bacon, paired with a side of tomato bisque soup and sweet potato fries. It was delicious. We watched tv, finished the rest of UP from last weekend, and then started to watch the pilot of this show he's very much into. I fell asleep about 20 minutes in, so I can't tell you much what it's about. We were both fairly tired, so we went to bed, and really just slept.
Yesterday was one month since our first date (I did not mention that to him - it didn't really seem relevant), and to be at the point where we spent an entire night/morning together that may have been passed by a G rated movie slightly unnerves me. Not that I need to be completely physical, all the time, but that's the only time I feel like I receive affection from him. If you take that out of the equation - it's no different than hanging out with a buddy. So, Sunday night and Monday morning lacked affection.
This morning we got up, and needed to get some coffee. He had mentioned making breakfast the night before, so when we were at the coffee shop, I was surprised when he got a cinnamon roll too. He asked me if I wanted anything, but I didn't get anything because I still for some reason thought he was going to make breakfast when we got back. He didn't. We watched Star Wars (because on Thursday night when we were out with his friends - it came up in conversation - he asked me a direct question about it - I had to admit that I have never in my life been able to stay awake long enough to watch the entire movie - I can no longer say that.) and around 1pm, he mentioned that he wanted to go for a bike ride. This wasn't a "let's go on a bike ride together" kind of comment. It was a "I'm going on a bike ride, you need to go" kind of comment. I was very confused because I had thought we were going to spend the day together. It was a beautiful day out. And I can understand him wanting to spend the day outdoors, I did too. We could have definitely done something outside, together. But he made it clear that he wanted to ride his bike, so I left. I hadn't eaten anything all day, I was frustrated that I had planned my day/evening to be in the city (I was going out for restaurant week with friends - so I planned on staying in the city all day and just meeting up with them after... not driving out and back to the city, yet again.) I was very let down, expectations wise. From where we started on Saturday to where we ended up today, I was just disappointed. Even the conversation we had briefly tonight left me feeling like maybe things have shifted a bit, things aren't looking as rosy as they once were, and I'm definitely not all smiles all the time. Oh real life, welcome back.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Smiles for miles
I've started writing this many many times. And no matter how I try to write it - it comes out sounding silly or poorly written. I could give you just the details of my date from Saturday night to Sunday, it was a lovely date. Or I could tell you how incredibly smitten I am when I'm with Google, but how I get nervous that it's all going to change when I leave. That I'm waiting for that other shoe to drop.
Let's go back to after the last date... Wednesday into Thursday, I was on cloud 9. As the day progressed, and I don't hear from Google as often as I'd like, I get nervous. Like maybe he's losing interest, instead of thinking about the rational - like maybe he's just working. I didn't really talk to him at all on Thursday, it was a busy day for both of us, and later on at night we were IMing, but he was DRUNK. I told him it's a good thing I could read inventive spelling after all my years teaching, or else it would have been an impossible conversation. I sent him a text the following morning, but didn't hear from him all day (again... I know, he's working, yet I think of it as disinterest.) I got home from work, and was checking up on twitter (he updates more on twitter than on facebook, it's a better way for me to find out what he's been up to), and I noticed he had a post from late late the night before when he was really drunk. It was about me. And he called me his girlfriend. After a whole day of thinking he was no longer interested because I hadn't heard from him all day, I was pretty happy to read that, but slightly perturbed by its meaning. Is he my boyfriend? We haven't had the DTR... at what point do you no longer need the DTR? We've only been dating for 3 weeks at this point. I think the DTR is still essential. I vowed to bring it up when I saw him on Saturday.
Wednesday he mentioned he wanted to take me "somewhere nice" Saturday night. I have no idea what this means. To Mr. Perfect, somewhere nice was the Olive Garden instead of Applebees, which was fine with me, but I had no idea what somewhere nice means to Google... except I was pretty sure it meant neither Olive Garden OR Applebees. He took me Saturday night to Tequilas. Oh dear lord, it was PHENOMENAL. One of my top 5 meals ever, I think it's safe to say. It was a fantastic night, at one point we had the small dining room all to ourselves. It was very romantic. We had margaritas, shared appetizers, delicious entrees, and dessert. It was a feast! The only time I'd ever be able to afford all that is during restaurant week (which is coming up - yay!), but this was not restaurant week, nor was it cheap at all. It's a different world dating someone who can afford to go to these places, and actually wants to take me to them. When I dated the poker player, who could definitely afford to take me anywhere I wanted to go, he never ever would have even thought about taking me somewhere nice. I always had to plan it. It's nice to date a guy who wants to take me out and surprise me with romantic gestures, big or small.
When we got back to his place, he set up the loft area so we could lay down and watch a movie by the fireplace. It was heavenly. After such a great meal, and an even more romantic setting, I start wondering if this is possibly even real. Seriously, does this happen to people? Does this happen to me??
In the morning, we lounged around for a while before deciding we were hungry, and walked over to the museum area for brunch. He took me to the Franklin Institute (really, just the Franklin now,) we saw the Body Worlds exhibit, a planetarium show, and wandered around the museum a bit. The last time I was there not on a field trip with my students must have been years and years ago, I can't remember the last time I went and actually got to enjoy myself without worrying about 80 kids at the same time. I had a lot of fun.
After the museum, we walked over to Whole Foods where Google got some ingredients to prepare dinner for his neighbors. It seems that every once in a while, one of his neighbors will cook a big meal, and they'll all gather to eat it. It's like a big family dinner - only without the family. It's a very cool living situation. Google made a delicious family recipe of chicken and noodles served in a chicken stock gravy over mashed potatoes (I made those!!) His neighbors came up for a few hours and I got to talk to them some more, although towards the end I was getting anxious for some alone time with Google before I had to head back to reality. I never got to bring up the girlfriend comment or the DTR this weekend, but maybe we don't need it. Maybe once you reach a certain age, these things are just understood.
I have to say that the time the two of us spend together is quickly becoming my favorite thing. I look forward to seeing him so much, and I don't ever want our time to end, it takes a lot for me to finally get in my car and get on my way home. He's inviting me out with his friends more often - he asked me to go out with them tonight but I couldn't make it, and Thursday we're going to some star watching exhibit at the Franklin with his friends. We talked about maybe going up to the city on Monday, although I feel bad making him travel there on his day off... he does that commute so often! I haven't been since October, and I'm itching for a visit. He also invited me to go out with him and his neighbors for his birthday (and one of his neighbor's birthday) in a few weeks. I like that he's thinking at least 2 weeks ahead!
So, this is my life right now. I'm so smiley all the time. Anytime anyone asks me about him, I just get this huge smile on my face and turn a few shades of red. This is so new for me... please, bear with me.
Let's go back to after the last date... Wednesday into Thursday, I was on cloud 9. As the day progressed, and I don't hear from Google as often as I'd like, I get nervous. Like maybe he's losing interest, instead of thinking about the rational - like maybe he's just working. I didn't really talk to him at all on Thursday, it was a busy day for both of us, and later on at night we were IMing, but he was DRUNK. I told him it's a good thing I could read inventive spelling after all my years teaching, or else it would have been an impossible conversation. I sent him a text the following morning, but didn't hear from him all day (again... I know, he's working, yet I think of it as disinterest.) I got home from work, and was checking up on twitter (he updates more on twitter than on facebook, it's a better way for me to find out what he's been up to), and I noticed he had a post from late late the night before when he was really drunk. It was about me. And he called me his girlfriend. After a whole day of thinking he was no longer interested because I hadn't heard from him all day, I was pretty happy to read that, but slightly perturbed by its meaning. Is he my boyfriend? We haven't had the DTR... at what point do you no longer need the DTR? We've only been dating for 3 weeks at this point. I think the DTR is still essential. I vowed to bring it up when I saw him on Saturday.
Wednesday he mentioned he wanted to take me "somewhere nice" Saturday night. I have no idea what this means. To Mr. Perfect, somewhere nice was the Olive Garden instead of Applebees, which was fine with me, but I had no idea what somewhere nice means to Google... except I was pretty sure it meant neither Olive Garden OR Applebees. He took me Saturday night to Tequilas. Oh dear lord, it was PHENOMENAL. One of my top 5 meals ever, I think it's safe to say. It was a fantastic night, at one point we had the small dining room all to ourselves. It was very romantic. We had margaritas, shared appetizers, delicious entrees, and dessert. It was a feast! The only time I'd ever be able to afford all that is during restaurant week (which is coming up - yay!), but this was not restaurant week, nor was it cheap at all. It's a different world dating someone who can afford to go to these places, and actually wants to take me to them. When I dated the poker player, who could definitely afford to take me anywhere I wanted to go, he never ever would have even thought about taking me somewhere nice. I always had to plan it. It's nice to date a guy who wants to take me out and surprise me with romantic gestures, big or small.
When we got back to his place, he set up the loft area so we could lay down and watch a movie by the fireplace. It was heavenly. After such a great meal, and an even more romantic setting, I start wondering if this is possibly even real. Seriously, does this happen to people? Does this happen to me??
In the morning, we lounged around for a while before deciding we were hungry, and walked over to the museum area for brunch. He took me to the Franklin Institute (really, just the Franklin now,) we saw the Body Worlds exhibit, a planetarium show, and wandered around the museum a bit. The last time I was there not on a field trip with my students must have been years and years ago, I can't remember the last time I went and actually got to enjoy myself without worrying about 80 kids at the same time. I had a lot of fun.
After the museum, we walked over to Whole Foods where Google got some ingredients to prepare dinner for his neighbors. It seems that every once in a while, one of his neighbors will cook a big meal, and they'll all gather to eat it. It's like a big family dinner - only without the family. It's a very cool living situation. Google made a delicious family recipe of chicken and noodles served in a chicken stock gravy over mashed potatoes (I made those!!) His neighbors came up for a few hours and I got to talk to them some more, although towards the end I was getting anxious for some alone time with Google before I had to head back to reality. I never got to bring up the girlfriend comment or the DTR this weekend, but maybe we don't need it. Maybe once you reach a certain age, these things are just understood.
I have to say that the time the two of us spend together is quickly becoming my favorite thing. I look forward to seeing him so much, and I don't ever want our time to end, it takes a lot for me to finally get in my car and get on my way home. He's inviting me out with his friends more often - he asked me to go out with them tonight but I couldn't make it, and Thursday we're going to some star watching exhibit at the Franklin with his friends. We talked about maybe going up to the city on Monday, although I feel bad making him travel there on his day off... he does that commute so often! I haven't been since October, and I'm itching for a visit. He also invited me to go out with him and his neighbors for his birthday (and one of his neighbor's birthday) in a few weeks. I like that he's thinking at least 2 weeks ahead!
So, this is my life right now. I'm so smiley all the time. Anytime anyone asks me about him, I just get this huge smile on my face and turn a few shades of red. This is so new for me... please, bear with me.
Thursday, January 07, 2010
Smitten
As if there were any question, I am officially smitten with Google guy. Seriously, it's a bizarre kind of euphoric excitement. I can't really equate to anything I've ever experienced before. I'm just plain ol' happy. He sent me flowers to school on Monday, which was a HUGE surprise. In the back of my wishful thinking mind, I thought, wouldn't it be nice to get flowers after spending such a lovely weekend together.. and not for a second did I ever think that would come to fruition. Well, there I was, teaching 5th period Social Studies, when I get a phone call from the attendance office, asking me if I can come down there. I was kind of rude when I told the lady who called that I couldn't come down because I was teaching (duh!), and she asked if I'd still be teaching when she came off her post at 1:15, because there was something there for me in the office. Of course my immediate thought is that I got flowers, because anytime I've ever received flowers at school (and surprisingly, I've gotten them a few times!), they call from the attendance office. But I quickly dismiss this idea... How would he know where to send them, have I told him where I teach, surely he wouldn't remember. I also remembered then that I just had a project funded through a donor's program, and I was expecting a brand new Digital SLR camera for my classroom... that was what I spent myself convinced it was in the office waiting for me, and not flowers, so I wouldn't be disappointed. When the flowers did arrive, my 5th period (true to every 5th period I've had before) was instantly curious about the sender. They were convinced it was my co-worker who sent them to me. He and I went to prom together my junior year, and the kids had just seen our prom picture - so they are convinced there is something more going on there. It doesn't help that he likes to fuel their fire (by asking questions like - Did you see the flowers I sent Ms. B?) But no, they were in fact from Google, with quite possibly the simplest, nicest note, "Best start to a year ever." My kids were bemused at how red my face would turn when they would ask me questions, so they fired away, not getting much out of me. And they were pleased with the fact that I was suddenly too happy to care what they really were or weren't doing.
Last night, I went to Google's place, where he cooked me dinner. It was delicious, and the entire evening was, in my book, pretty close to perfect. I'm all smiles all the time. It's a strange state for me to be in. I am really trying super hard to reign in all the emotions, and realize that just 3 weeks ago today was our first date - which I'm glad I didn't cancel due to lack of heat! I have a really hard time reading him, how he feels. I'm pretty sure he's reciprocating the feelings, but he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve (or on his face) like I do... I couldn't hide it if I tried tonight.
Last night we talked about all the things that had to fall in place in order for this to work itself out, a blizzard in Kansas being the main one. Had he gone home to Kansas, I wouldn't have gotten a chance to really see him before New Year's, which clearly I would not have spent with him then, and the rest of this would have turned out much differently. He mentioned the movie, L.A. Story, which I haven't seen, but apparently there is something about weather changing the course of your life. I'm pretty sure I have a blizzard in Kansas to thank for what has so far been a fantastic beginning to a new year.
Last night, I went to Google's place, where he cooked me dinner. It was delicious, and the entire evening was, in my book, pretty close to perfect. I'm all smiles all the time. It's a strange state for me to be in. I am really trying super hard to reign in all the emotions, and realize that just 3 weeks ago today was our first date - which I'm glad I didn't cancel due to lack of heat! I have a really hard time reading him, how he feels. I'm pretty sure he's reciprocating the feelings, but he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve (or on his face) like I do... I couldn't hide it if I tried tonight.
Last night we talked about all the things that had to fall in place in order for this to work itself out, a blizzard in Kansas being the main one. Had he gone home to Kansas, I wouldn't have gotten a chance to really see him before New Year's, which clearly I would not have spent with him then, and the rest of this would have turned out much differently. He mentioned the movie, L.A. Story, which I haven't seen, but apparently there is something about weather changing the course of your life. I'm pretty sure I have a blizzard in Kansas to thank for what has so far been a fantastic beginning to a new year.
Saturday, January 02, 2010
In the new year.
My first post of the new year, of the new decade! This is going to be a good year, if new year's is any indication.
Wednesday this past week (I know - it's Saturday already! I've had no time, you'll see why!!) Google and I had planned to hang out during the day. He was very busy getting ready for his new year's party, and I didn't want to keep him from getting done anything that he needed to do, but he insisted that he could get all his work done and still have time to go out. Originally, the plan was we were going to go to the art museum, he was going to give me some photography lessons, maybe watch some movies, get some dinner, etc. I knew that there was no way this was all going to happen in a day, but I was looking forward to the prospect.
I got there around 2pm, I met 2 of his neighbors (who live in the same building), and they were really nice. I had been nervous about meeting them because he spends A LOT of time with his neighbors, they are basically his best friends in Philly, and I knew their opinions would hold a lot of weight. Not that I thought they wouldn't like me, but I'm used to dating guys with no friends... so it's a little new. They are very cool (one reminds me a lot of myself, so that's a good thing, I think?) We decided to take a drive through Fairmount Park and try to catch some good light to take pictures. We really just ended up driving around and seeing the park. I think in all the years I've lived around Philly, I've never been through the whole park. We saw almost all of the park, we stopped only once, at the civil war memorial. It's really beautiful, but unfortunately, I didn't take any pictures. After our drive around the park, we had to stop and get some supplies for Google's pictures that he's framing. Before we went to the art store, we got lunch, delicious pizza and beer. We got some framing stuff, and went back to his place. He bought a 12 ft Christmas tree for his apartment, but didn't want to buy it before Christmas... understandably so, searching online for how much pre-lit 12ft Christmas trees cost, AFTER christmas, I haven't seen one that's less than $900. He wanted it up for his holiday party, and had it delivered on Wednesday, so we spent a good deal of time putting together this tree, decorating it. We took a trip to Target to get more decorations for the tree and some things for the party. Most of the day had been spent preparing things for this party, and it was a weird He's Just Not That Into You moment. If you've seen the movie, it was the party "hosting" scene, where the main girl didn't really know what role she played in the party. Now I KNOW I'm not hosting this party, but I'm doing a lot of prep work to be just a guest! But that's all I was going as, and that is fine by me. After Target it was nearly 8:30, and we just got some Pei Wei take out, went back to his place and watched (500) Days of Summer (yes, again for me! Love this movie). After the movie, we went to the bedroom, however this was thwarted by his cat. Google has a cat who is getting up there in years, and was upset about something that day, and peed in his bed. We didn't discover this until I laid down and realized that there was a wet spot on the bed. Yes, I laid in cat pee. Google was HORRIFIED. Rightfully so, I think most girls might have bolted at this point. I'm flexible, I took off my sweater (had a t-shirt underneath), and suggest we go lay upstairs by the fireplace, to keep warm. :) So, we're in his loft space, which has the fireplace, the roof deck, huge windows overlooking the art museum... it was quite the perfect setting. We forgot about the cat problem quickly. I ended up staying until after 3 am, and was still planning on coming back the following day!
New Year's Eve, all my other plans fell through, and Google's party was the only one I had to go to. I didn't want to go too early though, and knew I'd be meet a lot more of his friends, so I stressed about what to wear, what to bring, etc. I ended up stopping by the Target near my house and picking up a lot more decorations that they didn't have at the Target the day before. I thought it was a really nice gift, but felt weird going into the party with a bag full of Christmas decorations. By the time I got to the party, drove around the neighborhood for parking for a while, it was raining, I didn't care so much anymore. He was very good about introducing me to everyone, and everyone had clearly known who I was before I got there (good sign?). All his friends were really very nice and welcoming towards me. They all treated me as if I had been there as all of their friends and not just as his guest/date. It was a good feeling, nothing to be nervous about. Leading up to the new year, we played Apples to Apples, drank lots, and eventually made it up to the roof deck for the new year fireworks after watching the ball drop on TV. Besides a very sweet new year's kiss from Google, I got lots of warm hugs from many of his friends. It's a good group to be a part of, there wasn't any one there that made me feel like I didn't belong or treated me like an outsider. After the new year's excitement died down, the crowd settled in rousing renditions of Beatles Rockband songs. I think I came across as being much more shy than I really am, but when I'm in new situations, I'm not as outgoing as I tend to be once I'm more comfortable. I did eventually sing something. The party wrapped up around 3 and Google mentioned he still hadn't made his bed since he washed his entire bedding collection after the cat incident. So I suggested instead of making the bed, just go back to the fold out futon and the fireplace in the loft. I feel like this may become one of my favorite places, ever.
In the morning, we laid around for a while, eventually got up and went to brunch. We came back, and were very lazy for the rest of the day. We watched movies, took a nap, listened to music, took another nap. At 8, his neighbor downstairs had made dinner for the house, so we went down to her apartment to eat dinner. By this point we had spent nearly 3 days straight together. I couldn't tell if he was getting sick of me and wanted me to leave before dinner, or if he really wanted me to stay longer. I did stay, we had a delicious dinner, wine, and watched some tv with his neighbors. After all this, I eventually made my way back home. We talked about him coming to my house next Saturday (so I could have enough time to clean - yes, I need a week's notice!), but dinner on Wednesday is in the works too because neither of us wanted to wait a whole week. Needless to say, I'm not dating anyone else at this point.
All of the 5 guys who were in the works previously texted or called me to wish me a happy new year, and I'm sure I could see any of them if I wanted to continue dating them. Here's where I stand on these guys. 1) Guy who lives with his ex - really? Are we still doing this? We see each other maybe once a month, text occasionally, it's definitely not a relationship. I'd like to be friends with him, but I have no idea if that's something he would want. 2) Phillies Writer - we had a date tentatively scheduled for Wednesday, but he takes a long time to get back to me, I didn't hear from him from Friday until Tuesday night. So I had already made other plans at that point. He's not making a whole lot of effort to see me again, so I'm not really interesting in seeing him. 3) Music guy has emailed me and called since our date. I emailed him back, thanking him for the cd, and told him I wasn't going to be around for the concert on Thursday. He called me after the concert to wish me a happy new year, I haven't gotten back to him. 4) the guy who didn't want me to blog about him called me on Wednesday, while I was at Google's. I was actually baffled at why he was calling me. Based on how we left the date (again, if you need the details - email - i3rooklyngirl@gmail.com), I couldn't imagine why he would ever think I would have any interest in seeing him again. I didn't answer, I have no intention of calling him. That one is not even worth the effort of a cordial response. 5) The Christmas Eve bowling guy has texted me a few times since our date. I've kept the responses to a minimum. I wished him a Happy New Year, and that's about it. I haven't heard from any of them since the new year. In 2009, I had 6 potential prospects.
And then there was one.
New year, a new relationship, things are looking up for 2010.
Wednesday this past week (I know - it's Saturday already! I've had no time, you'll see why!!) Google and I had planned to hang out during the day. He was very busy getting ready for his new year's party, and I didn't want to keep him from getting done anything that he needed to do, but he insisted that he could get all his work done and still have time to go out. Originally, the plan was we were going to go to the art museum, he was going to give me some photography lessons, maybe watch some movies, get some dinner, etc. I knew that there was no way this was all going to happen in a day, but I was looking forward to the prospect.
I got there around 2pm, I met 2 of his neighbors (who live in the same building), and they were really nice. I had been nervous about meeting them because he spends A LOT of time with his neighbors, they are basically his best friends in Philly, and I knew their opinions would hold a lot of weight. Not that I thought they wouldn't like me, but I'm used to dating guys with no friends... so it's a little new. They are very cool (one reminds me a lot of myself, so that's a good thing, I think?) We decided to take a drive through Fairmount Park and try to catch some good light to take pictures. We really just ended up driving around and seeing the park. I think in all the years I've lived around Philly, I've never been through the whole park. We saw almost all of the park, we stopped only once, at the civil war memorial. It's really beautiful, but unfortunately, I didn't take any pictures. After our drive around the park, we had to stop and get some supplies for Google's pictures that he's framing. Before we went to the art store, we got lunch, delicious pizza and beer. We got some framing stuff, and went back to his place. He bought a 12 ft Christmas tree for his apartment, but didn't want to buy it before Christmas... understandably so, searching online for how much pre-lit 12ft Christmas trees cost, AFTER christmas, I haven't seen one that's less than $900. He wanted it up for his holiday party, and had it delivered on Wednesday, so we spent a good deal of time putting together this tree, decorating it. We took a trip to Target to get more decorations for the tree and some things for the party. Most of the day had been spent preparing things for this party, and it was a weird He's Just Not That Into You moment. If you've seen the movie, it was the party "hosting" scene, where the main girl didn't really know what role she played in the party. Now I KNOW I'm not hosting this party, but I'm doing a lot of prep work to be just a guest! But that's all I was going as, and that is fine by me. After Target it was nearly 8:30, and we just got some Pei Wei take out, went back to his place and watched (500) Days of Summer (yes, again for me! Love this movie). After the movie, we went to the bedroom, however this was thwarted by his cat. Google has a cat who is getting up there in years, and was upset about something that day, and peed in his bed. We didn't discover this until I laid down and realized that there was a wet spot on the bed. Yes, I laid in cat pee. Google was HORRIFIED. Rightfully so, I think most girls might have bolted at this point. I'm flexible, I took off my sweater (had a t-shirt underneath), and suggest we go lay upstairs by the fireplace, to keep warm. :) So, we're in his loft space, which has the fireplace, the roof deck, huge windows overlooking the art museum... it was quite the perfect setting. We forgot about the cat problem quickly. I ended up staying until after 3 am, and was still planning on coming back the following day!
New Year's Eve, all my other plans fell through, and Google's party was the only one I had to go to. I didn't want to go too early though, and knew I'd be meet a lot more of his friends, so I stressed about what to wear, what to bring, etc. I ended up stopping by the Target near my house and picking up a lot more decorations that they didn't have at the Target the day before. I thought it was a really nice gift, but felt weird going into the party with a bag full of Christmas decorations. By the time I got to the party, drove around the neighborhood for parking for a while, it was raining, I didn't care so much anymore. He was very good about introducing me to everyone, and everyone had clearly known who I was before I got there (good sign?). All his friends were really very nice and welcoming towards me. They all treated me as if I had been there as all of their friends and not just as his guest/date. It was a good feeling, nothing to be nervous about. Leading up to the new year, we played Apples to Apples, drank lots, and eventually made it up to the roof deck for the new year fireworks after watching the ball drop on TV. Besides a very sweet new year's kiss from Google, I got lots of warm hugs from many of his friends. It's a good group to be a part of, there wasn't any one there that made me feel like I didn't belong or treated me like an outsider. After the new year's excitement died down, the crowd settled in rousing renditions of Beatles Rockband songs. I think I came across as being much more shy than I really am, but when I'm in new situations, I'm not as outgoing as I tend to be once I'm more comfortable. I did eventually sing something. The party wrapped up around 3 and Google mentioned he still hadn't made his bed since he washed his entire bedding collection after the cat incident. So I suggested instead of making the bed, just go back to the fold out futon and the fireplace in the loft. I feel like this may become one of my favorite places, ever.
In the morning, we laid around for a while, eventually got up and went to brunch. We came back, and were very lazy for the rest of the day. We watched movies, took a nap, listened to music, took another nap. At 8, his neighbor downstairs had made dinner for the house, so we went down to her apartment to eat dinner. By this point we had spent nearly 3 days straight together. I couldn't tell if he was getting sick of me and wanted me to leave before dinner, or if he really wanted me to stay longer. I did stay, we had a delicious dinner, wine, and watched some tv with his neighbors. After all this, I eventually made my way back home. We talked about him coming to my house next Saturday (so I could have enough time to clean - yes, I need a week's notice!), but dinner on Wednesday is in the works too because neither of us wanted to wait a whole week. Needless to say, I'm not dating anyone else at this point.
All of the 5 guys who were in the works previously texted or called me to wish me a happy new year, and I'm sure I could see any of them if I wanted to continue dating them. Here's where I stand on these guys. 1) Guy who lives with his ex - really? Are we still doing this? We see each other maybe once a month, text occasionally, it's definitely not a relationship. I'd like to be friends with him, but I have no idea if that's something he would want. 2) Phillies Writer - we had a date tentatively scheduled for Wednesday, but he takes a long time to get back to me, I didn't hear from him from Friday until Tuesday night. So I had already made other plans at that point. He's not making a whole lot of effort to see me again, so I'm not really interesting in seeing him. 3) Music guy has emailed me and called since our date. I emailed him back, thanking him for the cd, and told him I wasn't going to be around for the concert on Thursday. He called me after the concert to wish me a happy new year, I haven't gotten back to him. 4) the guy who didn't want me to blog about him called me on Wednesday, while I was at Google's. I was actually baffled at why he was calling me. Based on how we left the date (again, if you need the details - email - i3rooklyngirl@gmail.com), I couldn't imagine why he would ever think I would have any interest in seeing him again. I didn't answer, I have no intention of calling him. That one is not even worth the effort of a cordial response. 5) The Christmas Eve bowling guy has texted me a few times since our date. I've kept the responses to a minimum. I wished him a Happy New Year, and that's about it. I haven't heard from any of them since the new year. In 2009, I had 6 potential prospects.
And then there was one.
New year, a new relationship, things are looking up for 2010.
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