It's been a while since I've even thought about writing anything about my relationship with Mr. Perfect. 7 months ago today was Valentine's Day. I didn't have a boyfriend then, and I remember I went to the gym that night. It was empty with the exception of those who were working and had to be there, and those of us who were single. I was single, and enjoying dating, and had a bunch of dates lined up for that weekend. I was happy with the status quo. I didn't think much about not having a boyfriend at the time, and my students were deeply interested in the relationship with my supervisor which was looking less and less appealing to me with every interaction. That is where I was 7 months ago today. 7 months ago tomorrow... I had the lowest expectations for that night's date of all the dates I had lined up. He seemed too needy, overly interested, like he just wanted a girlfriend. I sent my friend a text right before the date that said something along the lines of "want to hang out later? Have a date @ 6, but don't think it will last too long!"
Over the past 7 months, I've thought a lot about my initial misconceptions about my boyfriend. Do I think at the time he was interested in having a girlfriend? Yes, he wanted a connection with someone, and didn't enjoy the whole dating scene nearly as much as I had over the past 3 years. He had been single for 3 years, just about the same as me. And try as he might, he couldn't find what he was looking for in a girlfriend. He knew he wanted that connection, but couldn't understand why it wasn't happening. He was tired of dating, and ready for something to work out. I on the other hand, was avoiding that connection. I had found it in some, and sought out guys who were looking for less than a committed relationship before this one. Dating emotionally handicapped men, guys just out of relationships whose exes I knew, foreigners, guys with girlfriends, you name it, I was dating unavailable men. I thought I was looking for a relationship, but I was looking for excuses to have them not work out. There were times I was upset but it wasn't so much about the relationship and I was always excited to get back into the dating scene as soon as possible. So, maybe I judged Mr. Perfect too harshly in my initial opinions of his behavior. He was just someone who knew what he wanted, and wasn't afraid to put it out there. He wasn't playing a game, he never made me wonder if he was interested from the start. From day one he has always returned every phone call, text message, email as necessary. I've never been left wondering if he's all of the sudden not interested. He's exactly what every girl claims they want when they whine and moan about dating and the games men play. My boyfriend is a very literal person, and takes things at face value. He listens to people when they talk, and he believes people when they say, "I want a guy who doesn't play games...blah, blah, blah" I thought I meant that and wanted that all along, but I don't think I did while I was dating in the city. I criticized him for doing exactly what I said I wanted, and in the end, I'm the lucky one.
7 months ago tomorrow, at 11 pm, my 5 hour first date with Mr. Perfect ended. There have been wonderful times, and we've had some trouble over the past 7 months. Our relationship is in no way, shape or form, perfect. Like all healthy relationships, we fight. We argue, and make up. There are times we irritate each other, times I don't want to see him or talk to him, but that never lasts for very long. He supports me, and loves me, and I can't believe I was ever so foolish to think that he was anything other than perfect, 100%, for me.
